Day 11: Darius Loves Baseball and Triangulating Women

Draft 1

Fuck, man!

Darius quickly looked away from the bleachers, avoiding the girl who took pictures from the stand, her Canon straps dangling like the San Francisco bridge as she focused the lens on him.

He jogged back to his spot at first base, dragging the tip of his cleats against the white diamond before staring up at the blinding stadium lights. The stadium, home to a Christian high school, was cloaked in midnight blue. It was massive, the best field Darius had ever played on, and it was serene, surrounded by beautiful tall trees.

Absently, he glanced past his teammates back at the bleachers. The pretty woman, young-looking for her age, waved at him, her brown skin illuminated by the stadium lights, her afro puff perched on her head like a crown.

His smile was weak and uneasy as he waved back, the corner of his mouth cracked, and the smile quivered.

He could tell her the truth…that she was a side and not the main.

Nah, fuck that. She was the prettiest he’d found.

If only he could find some dirt on her…he’d feel better about this shit.

He smacked his free hand against his glove, frustrated. His children’s mother was at her crib, waiting for him to show up and eat crawfish with her and the kids.

But Crystal, the woman in the crowd, didn’t know that. She thought he was going to his brother’s house to spend time with his kids.

I’m a piece of shit, he thought, hanging his head.

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Draft 2

Fuck, man!

Darius quickly looked away from the bleachers, avoiding the girl snapping the pictures from the stand, her Canon straps dangling like the San Francisco bridge as she focused the lens on him.

He jogged back to his spot at first base, dragging the tip of his cleats against the white diamond before staring up at the blinding stadium lights.

The stadium, home to a Christian high school, was the best field Darius had played. It was massive, serene, surrounded by beautiful trees; now, it was cloaked in midnight blue. It was like Crystal, the best he’d experienced, shrouded in darkness.

Absently, he glanced past his teammates back at the bleachers. The pretty woman, young-looking for her age, waved at him, her brown skin illuminated by the stadium lights, her afro puff perched on her head like a crown.

His smile was weak and uneasy as he waved back, the corners of his mouth cracked, and his lips quivered.

He could tell her the truth…that she was a side and not the main. But then her feelings would be hurt, and she would leave…

She was sweet and innocent…but she didn’t play that shit. Not like his baby mama.

So, nah, fuck that. She was the prettiest he’d found. Eye candy. Niggas dabbed him up when they saw her next to him.

If only he could find some dirt on her…he’d feel better about this shit.

He smacked his free hand against his mitt, frustrated.

His baby mama was in her crib, waiting for him to show up and eat crawfish with her and their kids. She was feeling him again, and he enjoyed the respect and benefits.

But Crystal, the woman in the crowd, didn’t know that. She thought he was going to his brother’s house to bond, because she was into healing family wounds.

He’d never met a woman like her.

I’m a piece of shit, he thought, hanging his head.

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Draft 3 (light polish from ChatGPT)

Fuck, man!

Darius quickly looked away from the bleachers, avoiding the girl snapping pictures from the stand, her Canon straps dangling like the San Francisco bridge as she focused the lens on him.

He jogged back to first base, scraping the tip of his cleats against the white diamond before staring up at the blinding lights.

The stadium, home to a Christian high school, was the best field Darius had played. It was massive, serene, surrounded by beautiful trees; now, it was cloaked in midnight blue. It was like Crystal, the best he’d experienced, shrouded in darkness.

Absently, he glanced past his teammates back at the bleachers. The pretty woman, young-looking for her age, waved at him, her brown skin illuminated by the stadium lights, her afro puff perched on her head like a crown.

He gave a weak, uneasy wave. The corners of his mouth cracked; his lips quivered.

He could tell her the truth…that she was a side and not the main. But then her feelings would be hurt, and she would leave…

She was sweet and innocent…but she didn’t play that shit. Not like his baby mama.

So, nah, fuck that. She was the prettiest he’d found. Eye candy. Niggas dabbed him up every time she stood beside him.

If only he could find some dirt on her…he’d feel better about this shit.

He smacked his free hand against his mitt, frustrated.

His baby mama was in her crib, waiting for him to show up and eat crawfish with her and their kids. She was feeling him again, and he enjoyed the respect and benefits.

But Crystal, the woman in the crowd, didn’t know that. She thought he was going to his brother’s house to bond, because she was into that family-healing-wounds shit.

He’d never met a woman like her.

I’m a piece of shit, he thought, hanging his head.